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As someone who feels the need to be productive 20 hours a day; I am having a little bit of trouble with how time consuming this online dating thing is. You see a profile you like (I’m still all about PlentyofFish.com cuz of the hotties), you send a message and then the next thing you know, you are chatting on MSN. As fun and flirty as some of these chats have been, I’m on a timeline here! I know, I know: you can’t hurry love, blah, blah, barf, but I’ looking to actually “meet” someone… well, more like fifty someones, but if I’m on MSN all day it leaves me little time to do anything or anyone else! So my new rule is: No endless emails or chatting online. You like my profile, I like yours. Let’s have coffee.
So far I have 3 coffee dates lined up for next week. This makes my friends very proud, especially since I have ventured completely out of my comfort zone and selected 3 very different men–only one of which falls into what I deny is my “type” even though it seems to be the “type” that causes me to drool a little and lose my footing when one of said “type” walks by. This “type” would be the uber macho, tall, muscular Euro-stud with a goatee and slightly longer hair. Excuse me while I get a napkin to wipe the drool from my chin…
Whew! That’s better.
Anyway, I will soon need to come up with a list of characters for you because it will be far easier than having to explain which potential suitor I am referring to every time. But to give you a quick rundown on next weeks dates:
Monday: Cute musician-looking type who I’ve had awesome chats with and long to lick his tattoos.
Wednesday: Runner guy who is slightly older and physically smaller than what I generally prefer, but something about his smile was endearing. He gives good chat too!
Thursday: Super cute guy who is a couple of years younger but looks young enough to be my personal cabana boy! Chosen based strictly on his looks and eagerness to please — decision to meet was courtesy of my raging hormones that are suffering a bad case of the spring fever. I suspect this coffee will end with my ankles up around my ears in a park somewhere–weather permitting.
xo
I have always believed that you should have the highest of standards when it comes to yourself — especially true in terms of the men that you date, since utlimately you date them in hopes that they will be “the one”–the one who sets your heart a flutter for as long as you both shall live. So when my friends tell me that I am too picky, I have a really hard time seeing how that is a problem. If you settle you will end up with shit! Why would I want to date shit??
One thing that I am guilty of in terms of dating though is maybe being a little close minded–yes, strange for a girl who earns a living writing about sex. I tend to want things to go the traditional route: boy see’s girl and is smitten. Girl see’s boy and is also smitten. Boy asks girl out on date. Sadly, since my work tends to keep me in my apartment with only my dog for company (I can’t get it up for my stories at Starbucks like other writers), the opportunity to meet a guy the ol’ school way is just not really there. I realize now at the ripe age of 35 (going on 16) that I really do have to stop making fun of and swearing off other avenues such as Internet dating, set ups and all that. It is not just this realization that has given me the manic shove to get out there and try online dating and such, but also to prove that Mr.Perfect-for-me-in-spite-of-my-unusually-HIGH-standards really does exist and to shut-my-friends-and-family-the-fuck-up along-the-way.
So, as of today, I (who we will call ‘2Picky‘ ) solemly vow to go on 50 blind dates in search of Mr.Right. I also vow to record every hideous/creepy/inane/funny/embarassing and hopefully juicy detail so that other women can learn something from my experience… hopefully something positive though at this particular second I doubt it. Oops – trying to keep my mind as open as Jenna Jameson’s legs!
My search begins on Craigslist…
